A woman’s world is turned upside down after 13 years of marriage when her husband suddenly demands a separation and plans a drastic cross-country move, all while hiding a secret that could change everything. She uncovers a secret relationship with an old friend, leading her to a shocking crossroads.
On February 3, 2024, an anonymous woman posted a gripping account of how her 13-year marriage took an unexpected turn. Her seemingly happy husband grew frustrated with his job and announced plans to apply for a position across the country.
This news was followed by an unexpected and blunt recommendation. The Original Poster (OP) stated, “He went on a tirade about how terrible I am and out of nowhere suggested a separation.” She thought his reaction was excessive and baseless, despite their history of ups and downs.
In the weeks that followed, OP discovered her husband’s intensive correspondence with a recently divorced former acquaintance who had played a crucial role in helping him land this potential job. Their communication was so intense that they exchanged more than 500 SMS a day, totaling around 24,000 texts in a single month.
Online comments to OP’s account were overwhelmingly supportive, with many labeling her as “NTA” (Not The Asshole) for her choices and behavior in response to her husband’s betrayal and schemes.
The husband had a clear plan: he intended to move the whole family—OP, his mother, and their two elementary-aged children—to a new location. OP considered all of her previous sacrifices, including moving for his graduate program and current employment, before making this decision. “Moving away from the kids’ school and friends, as well as my work and friends, is unconscionable,” she said, expressing her dismay.
When her husband traveled to the prospective work site for what was supposed to be a one-day interview that lasted four days, the situation became more heated. During this time, OP discovered information suggesting he intended to start a sexual relationship.
When questioned upon his return, he defended himself by admitting that he had been “unhappy for 15 years.” After learning this, OP began to wonder if it was her fault, considering a divorce and seeking physical custody of their children to keep them in the state.
Citing his own experience of growing up without a father figure, her husband stressed the importance of the kids having their father present and said she was necessary for the children’s benefit.
Online comments to OP’s account were overwhelmingly supportive, with many labeling her as “NTA” for her choices and behavior in response to her husband’s betrayal and schemes. Her online community rallied to support her and analyze the circumstances.
“He’s angry because he lost his edge when you realized what was going on and hired a lawyer,” said one commenter. “It seems as though he intended to relocate you all and then anchor those children to his new site, leaving you stranded with the children. Fantastic work! You are unquestionably NTA!”
Another person added, “NTA. Because he is having an affair and doesn’t want to make trouble for anyone, he doesn’t get to completely ruin everyone’s lives.”
“NTA—no way would I move just for him to divorce you when you move,” said a third voice. “Without a doubt, get a divorce immediately before he quits his job.”
How do you feel about this story? Is it appropriate for OP’s husband to want a separation while pressuring her to relocate across the country for him? If you were in OP’s shoes, how would you respond? Would you support the husband’s choice or disagree with him?
